We’re becoming
familiar with CPH, the Copenhagen Airport. When we made the itinerary for this
adventure, it turned out that CPH had better connections to the US and our
other destinations than flying into and out of Stockholm, the other logical
airport. As a result, we will have gone into and out of CPH about 6 times by
the time we leave here for CLT.
So, if you’re
planning a trip to the Nordics, consider Copenhagen airport. As for the city
itself, well, the airport is convenient. And I’ll admit we found a couple of
good restaurants.
Before I go on
I want to say that all of the people we met in Copenhagen that weren’t on
bicycles were friendly and helpful. Great people. And we were fortunate enough
to spend those three days in a home that John Nelson found on AirBnb. Ana’s
home is in the suburbs of Copenhagen, convenient to the airport, and to
downtown. It’s modern, spacious, well appointed, and private. And an absolute
bargain compared to Copenhagen hotels. A great place to stay if you’re going to
Copenhagen, or even better, elsewhere in Denmark.
The Danish Train System (not
connected to the Metro) can get you around the country efficiently. Roskilde,
25 minutes outside of Copenhagen, is a must see.
But If you
detect I have some cynicism about Copenhagen right now, you’re right. I’ll
explain.
John and I went
with Diana and Debi yesterday to the airport, by taxi. And we decided to take
the Metro back to the B&B. We’d already become pretty familiar with the
Metro – you buy a ticket priced based on the number of zones you’re traveling
(our B&B is in Zone 3, Center City one 1). Makes sense. We did it several
times during our stay. Two zone tickets are about $6.00 – Copenhagen is not a
cheap place to visit (or live). And once we bought tickets, we never had to scan
them anyplace or verify them in any way. An honor system.
So, when
leaving the airport, John and I bought a couple of two zone tickets and got on
the Metro. Shortly after boarding a Metro “Steward” came through the car. I
knew she was coming because the Copenhagen guy standing next to me turned
quickly and walked toward the other cars. So much for his honor system.
The “Steward”
glanced at John’s ticket, walked on, and asked for mine. I showed her mine, she
looked at it, and told me she was going to write me a ticket for 750 Krone
(about $125), because I didn’t have a three zone ticket (which would have cost
about $4 more.)
The reason? All
rides from the airport are considered three zone rides, in spite of the Metro
map. Go figure.
The scheme was
apparent. 1. A confusing ticket scheme, one which visitors likely will get
wrong. 2. Ticket “stewards: on the airport cars, ones which visitors will
likely be on. 3. Outrageous fines, ones which a lot of visitors will go ahead
and pay.
Welcome to
Copenhagen, suckers.
The steward and
I had a long conversation over the ethics of this, during which I asked for her
identification. Turns out, her identification had expired at the end of last
year, which of course I pointed out to her. She said that it was a “minor
mistake,” and I pointed out to her that what I had done was a minor mistake,
that what she was doing was a big problem.
In defense of
the other friendly Copenhageners we met, I don’t think Metro Steward 54390 is
representative of everyone in the city. I think she’s from Norway.
You can
probably guess that I’ve written the letter to the Copenhagen Metro folks
already. Postings on all the travel sites I can find will follow.
Wanted to
mention this experience, just in case you detect a little negative attitude
toward Copenhagen in what I write below. But let me assure you, all that I tell
you about this God-forsaken city is both objective and factual.
So… Here’s the
BEST OF COPENHAGEN…
There are a lot
of bikes in Copenhagen. Lots and lots. Estimates are that in this city of
580,000, there are more bikes than people. This is very intentional. The city
has for years actively promoted bike riding with development of bike lanes,
bike parking, bike bridges, etc..
For Copenhagen,
bike riding is a way of saving energy, being eco friendly, promoting health,
and allowing Copenhagen to (rightfully) claim that it is the most bicycle
friendly city in the world.
Copenhagen is
also among the most highly taxed cities in the world and a new car is taxed at
180% of its price. Consequently, bike
riding helps to soften the very real fact that many Copenhageners simply cannot
afford to own a car.
It turns out
there are other ills associated with bike riding, just as with other means of
urban transportation. Bike congestion and bike parking are issues the city is
wrestling with. The city recovers over 13,000 abandoned bikes every year. Even
the least expensive bicycle in Copenhagen will cost you over $500 new, and
prices go way up from there.
And there is also
something called bike rage. It stems from the congestion, and from the attitude
of the bike riders, and occurs between riders and other riders, and riders and
pedestrians.
To an outsider,
it looks like there are very few laws regarding bike riding, at least laws that
are followed. One study indicates that bike riders stop at stoplights 90% of
the time. Congratulations. The Copenhagen chief of police has called the city’s
bike riders the “cuckoos” of traffic.
This is
important for visitors, who are probably pedestrian. The city is designed for
bike riders, not pedestrians. It keeps track of bike safety data, but a near as
I can find, doesn’t track (or doesn’t disclose) pedestrian safety.
As a
pedestrian, you will not feel safe, nor should you. You should never feel you
have the right of way, on a sidewalk or crossing a street. And never, never,
should you be in a bike lane. And it’s up to you to determine whether or not
you happen to be in one.
But, if you
want to take the risk, there are some well-known sightseeing venues in the
city.
One of these is
“The Little Mermaid”, pretty much a symbol of the city.
I’m probably
guilty of not paying attention, but my impression of “The Little Mermaid” was
that it was located at the entrance to Copenhagen harbor, and it served somehow
to welcome Danish sailors home from the seas.
I got it wrong.
The Mermaid, of
course, pays homage to Hans Christian Andersen’s rather deep story, and Disney’s later, shallow, remake.
Any sailors
returning from the sea who wished to see if the mermaid is welcoming them back would
have to go a long ways outside of their path to find out. They’d have to head toward
shore, look for the crowds of tourists, dodge the tour boats, and find the
mermaid in between a couple of cruise ships.
But the Mermaid
is the symbol of Copenhagen after all. As such, there is still debate a century
after she was created as to whether the sculptor captured the essence of what
HC Andersen intended. And she’s suffered multiple beheadings and losses of
limbs over the years from protests and vandals, some of whom apparently felt
guilty and later returned the limbs. She’s been painted, outfitted, and
disfigured. She’s been dynamited off her rock and into the bay, and on one
International Women’s day, she was outfitted with a dildo.
But perhaps the
worst humiliation was when the Mermaid was banned from Facebook. You see, the
statue is actually of a Mermaid, and
real Mermaids wear very little clothing, thus running afoul of Facebook’s view
of the world. But, after an apparently throroughreview, Mark Zuckerburg relented
and allowed that it was perfectly okey dokey for mermaids to have breasts.
Seeing the
Mermaid is a can’t miss experience.
The number one
tourist destination in Copenhagen is Tivoli Gardens. Tivoli is the world’s
second oldest amusement park, built in the 1850’s. Tivoli missed being the
oldest amusement park by only 300 years, to Bakken, built some distance outside
of Copenhagen in the 1500’s, presumably to avoid bicycle congestion.
John and Debi
spent the day one afternoon seeing Tivoli Gardens, while Marty, Diana and I got
out of Copenhagen to visit Roskilde and the Viking Ship Museum (more on that in
a different post).
John’s take was
that Tivoli Gardens was a nice old amusement park. As for me, if I want to see
an old amusement park, I’ll just go to Carowinds.
Nyhaven is a
part of downtown Copenhagen that you’ve undoubtedly seen in pictures. It’s a
canal that comes in from the bay and in the pictures you’ve seen is lined with
colored buildings, cafes with picturesque umbrellas, and has small sailboats
lining the waterfront.
Very picturesque.
John, Marty, and I went there
yesterday. So did every other visitor to Copenhagen. We almost lost Marty in
one of the many T-shirt shops.
When we found Marty, we grabbed a table at one
of the cafes under one of the picturesque umbrellas and treated ourselves
to $24.00 hamburgers, cheese and drink
extra. But, hey, it came with a few fries. But it was still a bit short of a
Happy Meal.
Which brings me
to…. Prices.
Denmark, and
Copenhagen in particular, have the highest taxes in the world, with total tax
burdens between 58 and 72 percent. That includes income tax, “church” tax,
property tax, Value Added Tax, and more. For that, they get a lot of government
services (I won’t start the discussion of the value they get those services, nor
why the Danes are happy about it, but I’d sure like to.)
And, congratulations!
You, as a visitor, get to help pay for those services too!
Copenhagen is
one of the most expensive cities in the world. Goods in shops are 42 percent
more than the European average. Meals in restaurants are up to 150 more than
the European average. But the prices are in Danish Krone, of course, so as a
visitor you mostly just enjoy your $24 burger and try not to translate krone to
dollars much. You won’t feel the pain until you see your Visa bill.
Freetown Christiania
is the 4th most popular tourist attraction in Copenhagen.
Christiania is a self described
“autonomous
anarchist” district founded within Copenhagen in 1971, when the initial
community members took over some unused army barracks in the city. Since then,
it’s developed its own set of rules and acted pretty much as an independent
entity where the
“hippie” ideals of the
60’s have lived on. They made their own rules, which included open use and
trade of marijuana. Freetown and the city of Copenhagen have had managed to
coexist for over 40 years, although not without occasional conflict.
There is a good
amount of long, gray hair in Christiania. There’s a strong feel of the 60’s,
the counterculture, independent living, and freedom to be who you like. You can
still feel that hippie vibe, but it’s now in the shadows.
There have been
some changes. The main “street” is festooned with colorful banners and shops.
It’s known as “Pusher Street.” With ample reason. You can tell the pushers.
They’re the young men with small stands displaying their goods. And, so you
don’t miss them, they’ll tell you as you pass that they have anything you want,
weed, hash, and “whatever.”
Since
Christiania is now a tourist attraction, it looks like there are more tourists
on Pusher Street than there are serious Christianiaites. In fact, Christiania
draws over 500,000 tourists a year.
That number of tourists has to
change a place that started as a home for counterculture. That’s why the tourist
books advise you to be careful taking pictures on Pusher Street, because the
street’s entrepreneurs don’t like their picture taken and “can be aggressive.”
It’s pretty
depressing.
Well, that’s pretty
much my Best of Copenhagen. If you’re planning on going, I hope I’ve helped.
I also hope
you’ve enjoyed reading this as much as I’ve enjoyed writing it. But I doubt that
you have.
This Post Dedicated to
Metro Steward Number 54390